There is no right or wrong with dating profiles. Well there is a lot of wrong on dating profiles but who cares?
Let’s face it, no matter what you write on your dating profile, if an idiot decides to contact you, it does not matter what you write or what your picture looks like, the idiot will contact you.
My dating profile mainly talk about myself just because I think if I mention what I like and do, I will paint a picture of myself that a guy can relate to or not. And if a person cannot relate, well then, is it really worth going on a first date? Is it even worth messaging the other person? I am avoiding the checklist. I don’t have a type. I trust my guts even if it does not seem to be that accurate. However, I do have a deal-breaker – height. Please wait before giving me a hard time about height again.
“Focus on your deal-breakers first, then re-evaluate the rest of the list.
So, then, how do you determine what is truly important and what isn’t? Many people are willing to concede — or, at least, they know they should concede — that looks, really, are only skin deep. Yet they still, explicitly or reflexively, rule out (for example) short men, tall women or people with weird laughs. “They say things like, ‘That’s just not what I’m attracted to,’” says dating coach Evan Marc Katz, author of Why You’re Still Single: Things Your Friends Would Tell You If You Promised Not to Get Mad.” (Source: Is your online dating profile too picky?)
Write on your profile you only want to date taller guys and you will still get shorter guys emailing you, either to abuse you because “he is smarter than taller guys” or “I might be short but I have a big dick.”
Write you want an athletic guy because a lot of your activities include climbing Mount Everest and doing monthly 10k marathons and the guy who “obviously” does not exercise – wondering if he actually can lift a finger to change the channel on the TV – will still contact you. (But okay he might still be interested in health and fitness so messaging might settle this.)
You will have 100s of articles out there telling you how to write your dating profiles, and here at Stuzz.com I’m pretty sure we wrote about it. But we have also tested different type of dating profiles from the checklist type to total sarcasm and it does not matter, it’s always 50/50 (realistically 80 bad, 20 acceptable).
My deal-breaker is still height: you have to be taller than me, because if you are not it is awkward. And yes I have dated shorter men. Not so long ago I matched with a guy on Tinder that had a nice face, and when I say nice face, it does not mean “super-hot” there was just something in his eyes and the way he smiled; I was drawn to him. And even though his height was not mentioned I swiped right: it was a match. He messaged me almost instantly, we started chatting and we hit it off.
At that point, I could not figure out when to pop the question: how tall are you? The next day he invited me to a BBQ and again, I did not know how to pop the question but I figured I would just meet him and find out for myself. He ended up being shorter, by not a lot if I was wearing flat shoes. But I put that aside because he was genuinely a nice guy. We dated for a few weeks but it was awkward and I could feel it as it was so obvious. I’m pretty sure anyone who saw us together would never have guessed we were dating. Great mates yes, but not a couple. It bothered him more than me because I had decided to give it a go as we got along great. It did not work out.
I can’t figure out why guy will always bother to put their body shape, no matter what it is, but height is always optional. I wish all dating sites and apps would make those compulsory answers in a profile.
So now I ask the question up front when a guy contacts me if there is no height mentioned on his dating profile or I swipe left. It’s an easy filter for me.
A guy contacted me on Badoo:
Hi, how are you doing?
I’m great and yourself?
Good. Can I meet you?
Depends. Are you taller than me?
Great. We exchanged numbers. His dating profile did not reveal much but we had a few common interests. His pictures were okay. We talked on the phone. There were quite a few alarm bells when the conversation went from swimming in a pool to having a bath. Then he asked if I wanted to spend a few days at his house to which I replied no because I don’t know enough about him and would like to meet in a public place first. Because of the poor connection, for which I was glad in a way, the conversation was cut short so he resumed by way of text. I was at the shops doing some last minute Christmas shopping with Daughter before meeting up with my friend Mandy to go to the movies. I showed the first text message to Daughter:
WTF. Block him!
But I wanted to see where this was going exactly. Curiosity? Fun? Maybe prove myself wrong?When I showed Mandy the messages, she shook her head in disbelief:
How do you find them? Why are the weirdoes always messaging you?
I have no answer to this. Some will say: What do you expect on Badoo? From my personal experience, I get the same type of guys on OKCupid, POF, RSVP and Tinder. So maybe one dating site has more of the others but at the end of the day they have an eclectic type of guys (and women) who want different things – a relationship or just a booty call.
So there is no right and wrong and there is plenty of rights and wrongs. But it will depends on who reads your dating profile. But please, do make the effort to fill out your dating profile, even if it’s just one sentence.