[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]There’s a reason behind this post, other than the rapid advance of Don Juan de Marco’s favourite day of the year. Here’s the background.

After a very sour marriage break up, too long for a divorce to be sorted I have finally been able to request my Decree Absolute.

I’m also sitting here watching Don’t Tell the Bride, and instead of thinking what a load of tosh, I’m actually fantasising about getting married! I must be insane.

My boyfriend and I are a little Four Weddings and a Funeral in terms of our current marriage aspirations. He’s my lobster and I’m pretty sure I’m his, but he has no desire to get married. It’s a standing joke, he finds the perfect song for a first dance and sets an impossible mission for me to guess what it is or miss the chance of being proposed to. Needless to say there’ll be no proposal.

It does go a little deeper than a perpetual joke at my hopes and dreams expense. Neither of us are religious, and we also have a rebellious streak that makes us want to deny the label that society applies to ‘marriage’.

Still, I can’t help but dream.

Valentines, romance or lust?

To get back to the question, is valentines full of romance or just for those couples in lust? What I mean by that is after a few years, with feet comfortably under the table and pyjamas on instead of lingerie, do we still have the same expectations from the day of lovers?
Personally I think it’s for each and every one of us, in a relationship or not, in love or lust or even just admiring from afar.

Yes there’s the issue of commercially spewed out tat that holds no value, and as the fateful words of my ma still ring in my ears when I bought her the plastic rose in a silver vessel, ‘you shouldn’t have bothered’ I can’t help but feel it’s OK. For one day it doesn’t matter. Be cliché, be tacky, be elaborate, be demure, be something that shows the world you have a heart and more importantly that you would like to be loved. Or lusted after!

For those of you on the tentative first steps of your lovers journey, embrace the Valentine. Use it as an excuse to test the boundaries, how many flowers are too many? Does she like cuddly toys? Milk tray or Hotel chocolat? It won’t be a mistake if it’s under the disguise of Valentine’s day.

Those of us who are simply in lust, have fun, make someone smile, send a card, leave a trace of clues, add some spice to someone’s day, just promise me it’s not unwanted attention and knock yourself out!

Any sceptics remaining out there, those of us who are in a comfy relationship right now, don’t give in to the humdrum. It doesn’t need to cost a penny, but effort is required. Of course we don’t need a special day to tell our significant other how much we love them, but does it really hurt to take a step back from this crazy world and put an extra helping of romance into your day? Leave a note for them to find, make heart sandwiches, have a fake tattoo, dye your hair red, give them your undivided attention for a few hours and enjoy.

Life is too short. Relationships are a fragile part of this world, nurture and enjoy them before you blink and the best has already passed you by.

Most importantly, feel the love.

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